There is something cool about a girl who will climb all over a massive, greasy earth-mover, washing it with a steam-cleaner, ripping her pants, getting splattered with mud, and burning herself with the hot water, and when she has spent all day on it she turns and says, filthy and grinning:'it good to actually work once in a while!'And yet throught it all she remains feminine and beautiful. This is a girl to cherish; a girl to imitate.

I've got that feeling where I want to write, but when I sit down I draw a blank. Maybe I have just been really sick lately. Or maybe I am emotionally drained. Perhaps I am stressed. In fact, I know I am all of the above. However, life has taken on a cheery bright 'Oh-well-whatever-comes-it-will-all-be-alright, so I am relatively content. A little adventure and little love, that's all I need.

Dishes in the sink
Pausing as I think
Slept but a wink
I re-attempt to link

Clutching my warm gun
Sometimes having fun
I'm not sure I have won
Soon enough it's done

My faith is filled
I am awed and billed
Ugliness was spilled
And sinfulness killed

Thank goodness

Happiness it not determined by your living situation, the size of your pocketbook, whether you have transportation or where you think you are going in life. Happiness is determined by your relationship with your creator. Period.

Thoughts about the Glen Tavern Inn: It brought us together, made us friends. It had a combination of quaint mystery and run-down realism that made you want to be part of it, and those who lived there seemed particularly adept at life. It was at the same time real and a fairytale. For me it was a sort of halfway point between TAC and life outside of college, and I have very fond memories of that place. But my words are stiff, and I sound mechanical; what is wrong? I am filled with deep and confused emotions...

It has been a little while since I have posted. Getting all packed up and heading North for a house-sitting job and some giant tractor painting. I feel very strange. I drove all night in Daddy's '65 Mustang, thinking about my graduation, my girlfriend, and the exhilaration I always feel when I am on the road again. The night was very black, and the road was long...nestled in my driver's seat cocoon, surrounded by a myriad of my belongings, I realized just how alone and free I actually was. I have never been this unbounded and anchorless. Yet I am happier than I have been in ages. I am looking at life with new hope, new determination, new joy. I have hopes and dreams, I am beginning to regain love and charity. This life can be very beautiful, and I thank God that I was given the grace to finish school, and especially for the present; the awesome, crazy present.

Not now, not now, I have things to do...like try to grasp the concept that my life at TAC is over, that I have a bachelor's Degree. I doesn't make any sense, I'm just pretendin' to be growed up't, right? RIGHT!?

The GashlyCrumb Tinies - You have a terribly wicked
sense of humour and people are drawn to your
wit. Children beware of the thin, pale man
with the black umbrella!


Which Edward Gorey Book Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Well, now, there, then...


You will be sucked dry by a leech. I'd stay away
from swimming holes, and stick to good old
cement. Even if it does hurt like hell when
your toe scrapes the bottom.


What horrible Edward Gorey Death will you die?
brought to you by Quizilla

I have a question: why does a person have conflicting opinions from one moment to the next? You grasp something important and sublime in each case, but the one case contradicts the other. What is going on here? How can a person discern which case is more right? How do you keep emotion from deciding for you with out denying feelings? I want to know, I want to understand...I want to be certain, but I know this is not always God's will. And what about those emotions? Dark, powerful, beautiful, necessary, dangerous...o so dangerous.

I am shocked and saddened by the recent social developments in my class. What has happened to our strength, our courage, our desire for truth and goodness? Very bad things...I love them all so much, and they are in pain, and I am in pain, and the grim cloud of unhappiness and evil reaches it's icy fingers into our midst. This should be such a joyful time, and we are cursed by our sins. God save us all, we need prayers.

Perhaps sometimes blogging is bad...I am sitting here, a lab final in a few short hours, not really prepared, and I'm blogging. Oh well, this is remedial in some way I guess. I am filled with desire to write, but my mind is stagnant. I feel like producing something great, but I am sitting and staring at a lame, dirty computer monitor. *sigh*
Heave yourself up, man! Sharpen those pencils, go study that lab, be vigorous, be happy, be confident! Believe that life is incredible, you can accomplish anything! And you can, but for now there is somber reality...

And another worthless quiz when I should be studying for lab...

According to the "Which Big Lebowski character are you?" quiz:

Why don't you check it out? Or we cut of your Johnson!

NailINcoffin you are a bad influence:

According to the "What Weather Phenomenon am I?" quiz:

My forecast says you'll check it out! Click here!

A limerick:

A serious young man of intelligence
Applying himself with great diligence
Commited by reason
An act of treason:
He thought himself out of existence

There is something about being on the road with mellow music playing low, not driving too fast, just soaking up the beauty of an evening, the freshness of the air, the sound of spinning wheels and the low engine hum. The windows are down, the sun has just set, the road is all yours, empty and comforting. Life is about change; about renewal and discovery...I guess that's why we love the feel of the journey, the road trip, the hike, whatever. Neoteronous has already spoken sagely on this subject, but I am moved tonight...

The unexamined life is not worth living.
The unexamined life is worth living.

This is the very last day of class
Hoping my finals I may pass
Dangerously tempted my tutors to sass
Already missing all this; alas!
New life is coming: grad school, my ass!
Sorry. (Sometimes thoughts and words turn crass)
But it's been a blast
Gone much too fast
Brain in a cast
And this is the last...
Day of class
Time together
Here

Bring it.

I heard from an old friend today.
I did fair-to-middling on my final.
It just now begining to sink in that I will never have another class at TAC.
Mate is calling my name.
So is my bed.
She came to see me today.
I am hungry.
I feel quite content.
Perhaps I will think of another random thought to post; perhaps not...




Nope.

An amazing last seminar with Ferrier...I love that man. The discussion on love with the Dr. combined with a conversation over lunch with two very good friends and another one that lasted until almost 5 in the morning leads me to think that JP II is certainly blessed if not a real saint. Theology will not be completed in words and philosophical writings, but in the conversations and interrelations of people---the body of Christ Himself. Though our natures must be tamed, we were created as we are out of love and after the image of perfect beauty. And though we have darkened and perverted our natures through the fall of Adam, that which we desire, and that which moves us, come from proper desires and the apprehension of truly good things. It is only through looking to ourselves that we are stunted and deformed by sin. If only we had the strength to grasp the roots of being and the ability to follow in wholesome delight to joyful path out of the earth and up to the heavens, to our Glorious Creator, our Passionate Lover.

I will post...but not now